YOGA, POP MUSIC AND A LESSON IN ACCEPTANCE
Picture credit: Monica Montanaro - http://www.monicamontanaro.com/
It was my first yoga class in a couple of years. My immediate feeling was one of skepticism. I couldn’t imagine that Americanised yoga would be even close to the real thing. But, I told myself, I wasn’t here for real yoga, I was here to stretch my body. I needed to give some reprieve to my sore muscles and to relieve my stress. The class had about twelve other students. I entered the room and found an empty corner close to the back. I didn’t want anyone watching me from behind. It made me feel self-conscious. I rolled out my new purple yoga mat and sat down in a lotus position. The instructor, a young woman who looked quite fit, walked around the room for a few moments and then dimmed down the lights. After a few mintues she instructed us to stand at the front of our mats, straight, tall and grounded. We raised our hands above our heads to the sky and did a forward bend. I recognized the beginning of a sun salutation. I could feel my body embracing and welcoming the movement. It felt good. We moved into downward dog and held the stretch for breaths of four counts. After holding this for, what I thought, much too long, we moved into child’s pose. My arms began to ache but I could feel my mind beginning to calm down. This was going to be great. I thought to myself. Yes, this is exactly what I needed.
Suddenly out of nowhere, I heard the lyrics of #Adele and her song, "hello" in the background. Normally I woudl have enjoyed this sound, but while sitting in child’s pose, I felt irritated. What on earth? I thought. Why is the yoga instructor playing pop music? As if Adele wasn’t bad enough, as we began to move again into our sun salutations, another popular pop song came on over the speakers. We began to move through the poses faster and faster. I was beginning to sweat and with each flow and sound of the music drumming in the background, I could feel my frustration burning through me. This isn’t yoga, I thought. This was an aerobics class. I came here to relax and calm down and now I was even more upset than when I had entered the room to begin the class. I was now raging with frustration and said “fuck you” to the instructor with my mind. How dare you ruin this class for me! I was determined to tell her that this wasn’t yoga and that the music should change. I made up my mind. I thought I knew it all. So my entire class was spent on imagining how I would approach her after class and explain the absolute disappoint I had.
As the class went on, I noticed other negative thoughts that came plummeting through my mind and into my heart center. I was angry, angry that I had lost my job again. Angry that my book wasn’t selling. Angry that I had moved away from a place I had called home for fifteen years, to attempt to be with Addison, the one who should be my one true love. I couldn’t see past my my negative emotions and began to build up my woe is me bubble. The world and the Universe, I concluded, were against me. And the music was the icing on the cake.
Towards the end of the class I seriously began thinking that I would just walk out. This was clearly a joke. How could I calm down with that horrible music was in the background? Again I shouted in my mind, how is this yoga?? I looked at the students around me. All of them seemed calm and even enjoying each pose. Obviously they had no idea what yoga was really about. They had fallen into the lie of billboard American yoga. Finally, much to my relief, the music ended and we also ended, sitting in a lotus position and bowing Om Shanti to the instructor. I sat there mesmerized. Had this been for real? As the students were leaving, I gathered my courage and decided someone, simply someone had to tell this instructor the right way. And that someone was going to be me.
I slowly rolled up my yoga mat and walked over to the front of the room.
“Hi.” I said with perhaps a little too much eagerness.
“Hi. Did you enjoy the class?” The yoga instructor smiled and already this made me feel a bit nervous.
“Well. The movements were great.” I paused, wondering how I would approach this. I had to say this delicately.”
“But?” She questioned as if knowing there was more to come.
“Well, the music isn’t very yoga like.” I sputtered out the words.
“I know it’s not. But that’s the point.”
The point? I wondered. How could that have been the point?
“I tailor each class to a different theme and the music reflects the theme.”
“Oh.” I was beginning to feel like a heel.
She laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ve had this happen before. A new student comes in and wonders, how the heck is this yoga? Most of the time they are swearing at me under their breath.” She smiled and I wondered how I had fallen into such an obvious trap.
“I was swearing at you.” I laughed now.
“Good! It means I did my job. The class today was about the unexpected and how to handle situations that come up in life that you don’t expect. It looks like this has some deeper meaning for you.”
I couldn’t help but acknowledge that she was right. It wasn’t at all about the yoga class. It was about the fact that I had just lost my job. Quite unexpectedly and out of the blue and I had no idea how to deal with it. My only way of dealing with it was to get angry.
“I’m Cindy, by the way.” She finally introduced herself. “Give it another try. Next week. And remember, don’t expect it to be the way you expect. The Universe is a little bit smarter than you and knows what she’s doing. Even if your ego tells you otherwise. No matter how bad things look from your viewpoint.”
Suddenly Cindy’s words made me realize what I had been doing all week. Again. There was something bigger happening that I couldn’t yet see and I was fighting it all the way, even into my yoga class.
“Thanks Cindy. I will. I’ll try again next week.”
